Many women complain that men change; they start out
wonderful and then progressively become less generous, less open, less
patient, less interested, less caring... less everything we want. They
start out princes and turn into frogs. It happens in romance, families,
even the workplace.
Women also complain that men don't change – no matter how much we criticize their bad behavior, they just keep doing it. We criticize, complain, and try to find out why they act that way.
We've even tried to change ourselves to motivate better behavior. If I improve, shouldn't he? But nothing seems to work – to keep the wonderful behavior around and eliminate the unacceptable behavior. Frogs remain frogs and princes turn back into frogs, no matter how many times we kiss them.
Some of us have wondered if the prince was ever real? Was he just a con artist? Can we trust our own judgment? And more importantly, can we ever get what we need from men?
Twenty years of studying men has shown us that it's simpler than we thought...
We don't have to change men to get what we need...we just have to change the way we see men. Because, in our no-fault ignorance, we've been trying to get the best from men by doing what works for women.
For example, many of us want our men to communicate more. To share their thoughts and feelings, their goals and concerns. To include us and connect with us. We try to initiate the dialogues we love, hoping to talk back and forth, in a flow of thoughts, feelings and information being shared.
We might start with a question. Or by revealing something and looking for him to reciprocate. But if falls flat or feels like pulling teeth. Because this format actually prevents men from saying anything important or meaningful. What creates flow for us creates frustration for him. The result: he stops talking and our feelings get hurt. We both shut down and feel less loved, less cared for, less respected.
There is a better way...
In The Queen's Code, I'll give you the secrets to having men open up and talk to you about important things and intimate things. And you'll learn the secret language for getting what you need from men...with less effort than it takes to change a frog into a prince.
Women also complain that men don't change – no matter how much we criticize their bad behavior, they just keep doing it. We criticize, complain, and try to find out why they act that way.
We've even tried to change ourselves to motivate better behavior. If I improve, shouldn't he? But nothing seems to work – to keep the wonderful behavior around and eliminate the unacceptable behavior. Frogs remain frogs and princes turn back into frogs, no matter how many times we kiss them.
Some of us have wondered if the prince was ever real? Was he just a con artist? Can we trust our own judgment? And more importantly, can we ever get what we need from men?
Twenty years of studying men has shown us that it's simpler than we thought...
We don't have to change men to get what we need...we just have to change the way we see men. Because, in our no-fault ignorance, we've been trying to get the best from men by doing what works for women.
For example, many of us want our men to communicate more. To share their thoughts and feelings, their goals and concerns. To include us and connect with us. We try to initiate the dialogues we love, hoping to talk back and forth, in a flow of thoughts, feelings and information being shared.
We might start with a question. Or by revealing something and looking for him to reciprocate. But if falls flat or feels like pulling teeth. Because this format actually prevents men from saying anything important or meaningful. What creates flow for us creates frustration for him. The result: he stops talking and our feelings get hurt. We both shut down and feel less loved, less cared for, less respected.
There is a better way...
In The Queen's Code, I'll give you the secrets to having men open up and talk to you about important things and intimate things. And you'll learn the secret language for getting what you need from men...with less effort than it takes to change a frog into a prince.